We are stuck at home with the infinite amount of time to think or to do work. God its so difficult to do work when you feel like your in the middle of an apocalypse and life changes. I often ask myself why did I go back to California? Why did I throw my life into a cup like dice and shook it. What are the results let me see?
I am unsure. Unsure of which way to go and how to affect others. He can't be on this roller coaster forever. It's cruel and unsettling. I hated to feel as if the love I relied on wasn't stable and true. I still have fireflies in my eyes and missing my heart. It's gone on a run after seeing you. Gosh Darn it. It's a poem.
I still have fireflies in my eyes and I’m missing my
heart
It's gone on a run after seeing you
It's trying to catch
the spray of the ocean within its hands
Trying to keep up with your shadow on that hike
I keep trying to reel it back in but its slips in out like dream
I dream about you and flickering of the lights
The way the shadows of the fire would make shapes on your cinnamon
skin
I just wanted to pick each one out
A requiem to those country sounds
The sway of the grass and hot mocha against our lips
Sometimes life is picture of a scene
Unblemished and out of focus
Hazy and quick footed
Can you hear it? My heart running down that muddy path
Out of breath but not wanting to come back
So cheesy but so true. Maybe I will catch it- I need to. The reality is my life has changed since seeing you. I got a taste of other road and different views. It's easy to want to just fall back in the lull. Fall back into routine. Life is not so cut and dry and that's what I'm learning. I'm battling feelings and emotions.
Thank you for existing and giving me the gift of different choices.
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